The Troubles of Being Human
by Shadow.Alchemist13
Summary: A group of old friends, reunited after years of being seperate. Now one is drinking her days away, a pair cuts themselves, another is in an abusive relationship, and the last is about to be expelled. A story of how they get through it all. RinxLen, MikuxKaito, HakuxAkaito... oneshot, considering making it longer


**Before anyone asks, no, I do not cut myself, never have been in an abusive relationship, have ever had been a drunk, or been expelled. I was just in a really morbid/depressed mode about other things, so I wrote this, which somehow made me feel better (I'm so sadistic). Anyways, read on...**

**Disclaimer: If I owned Vocaloid, would I be writing this?**

* * *

I look at my wrist as a slow gush of crimson blood begins flowing from my wrist. In the background I hear my parents fighting over who-knows-what, but I ignore them; I've grown up ignoring their fights, so why start paying attention now? I lean over the sink, knife in one hand, the other one balled into a tight fist.

After I finish my now-daily session of cutting myself, I recover both my wrists with arm warmers even though I only cut my left one.

It's not that the pain makes me happy; it's that I can control it. Unlike my parents fighting, or my classmates torturing me, I can actually have control over something, even if it is self harm.

And _that_ is what feels good.

After I'm done, I fill the bath tub with hot water. As I wait, I scroll through my music list, trying to find the perfect song to listen to right now. I find the perfect one- a song by my once-best friend, Hatsune Miku. It's called 3331, and it's absolutely genius. I jam my headphones into my ears, and then lower myself into the water, enjoying the warm water swirling around my body. I can still hear my parents, so I turn it up, blocking them out.

_According to what they say in stories _  
_Life must be full of happiness, apparently _  
_If that's true, then my every day _  
_Cannot even be called a life_

I miss Miku. It wasn't like we had a dramatic fight that ended our friendship, or that she began bullying me over some guy, or anything. In fact, out of our group of five, she was the one I was friends longest with- all the way up to eighth grade, middle school. No, what drove us apart was her boyfriend. Eventually she became too busy, and I became too bored of being the third wheel.

_Hey I don't care whoever you are just be nice to me _  
_To the point I might even mistake your kindness for something more _  
_"I'm not worthless yet" _  
_I need to think so it's not exactly extremely so, but_

We drifted apart. I got more into music, she got more into being the perfect girlfriend.

_Living is simple _  
_While not living is much more difficult _  
_Look, even if I don't cherish it _  
_My life is already too much for me to handle_

_Looks like the card game is in its final stage _  
_Doesn't seem like any good hand will appear _  
_Even so, I'm going to use the remaining luck _  
_To live through my life of ten years, smiling as much as I can_

I don't blame her- even I think that I'm a pretty boring person. It's no wonder why I have no friends except for Megurine. If that even counts.

_Ahh who could have turned this world _  
_Into something so wonderful yet so mediocre? _  
_But I can't give up, I can't stop _  
_Even if I was to stop "So what?"_

_Ahhhh _  
_Every single day, there is no encore _  
_It's good-bye once the sun goes down _  
_The end roll may come up _  
_But I won't know which name is whose anyway_

I wonder if she ever thinks about the old days, like me. When all of us- Len, Miku, Kaito, Haku, and I- were all together, all friends. We all went to the same Elementary school. Those days were perfect- the only worries I ever had was if the ice cream man would still have shaved orange, or if I would manage to beat Len in an arm-wrestling contest. I always did, but I suspected that he let me win. Maybe.

_There is no encore to my life _  
_With only one life left, I can't sleep at night out of worry _  
_Even if I was to get stuck and fall down by accident _  
_No one would even notice _  
_As there is no value to the thing we call "human"_

_According to what they say in stories _  
_Everything in life is irreplaceable, apparently _  
_If that's true, then I have the feeling _  
_That my future can no longer be changed_

_Hey if that's the case, then let's just put an end to this _  
_Ahh this would solve everything, and we'd end up with a happy ending _  
_Come on please give me your hands, ladies and gentlemen _  
_Life was beautiful_

_Look_

But then middle school came, splitting us all apart. Len to Crypton MS, Haku and Kaito to UTAU Middle School. Miku and managed to stick together and go to Vocaloid Middle school.

_What are you crying about?_  
_Why are you crying?_  
_Isn't this what you wanted?_  
_Come on laugh_  
_Laugh with all your might_  
_If you don't want to then you have no choice but to live_

_Ahhhhhhhhh_  
_Every single day, there is no encore_  
_It's good-bye once the sun goes down_  
_The end roll may come up_  
_But I won't know which name is whose anyway_

Now we all go to Crypton High School together, but we aren't friends again. What little I see of them is just in the hallways. In freshman year, we would nod at each other, or try to make conversation, but eventually we just stopped, knowing that there was no point. We have different friends, different lives, different problems. No point in getting some childhood friends involved.

_There is no encore to my life_  
_With only one life left, I can't sleep at night out of worry_  
_Even if I was to get stuck and fall down by accident_  
_No one would even notice_  
_As there is no value to the thing we call "human"_

"Rin?" My mom knocks on the door as Miku song ends. "Rin, you okay?" I glare at a wall before answer.

"I'm fine, Mom," I say, trying to keep the anger out of my voice.

I try not to hate my parents, I really do.

"When will you be out?"

"Sometime," I say. My mother leaves, knowing better than to try and push me. I sigh, and sink down into the water so that only my nose and eyes are above it.

Life sucks

* * *

Miku's P.O.V

I slowly begin covering myself up with various objects of clothing, hoping that my mother won't notice that I'm wearing long sleeves when it's burning outside. She usually doesn't, so why start now?

"I'm going now," I say, planning to head out to school.

"Sure. Have a safe trip," my mother calls while entering the foyer to see me off.

My beautiful, amazing mother.

I feel bad for hiding such things from her.

But I know that if she knew the truth, it would hurt her a lot more.

I take my time going to school, not wanting to run into Dell.

Dell. My boyfriend of 0 years. The person who beats me up on daily bases of 4 years.

In the beginning it was wonderful. He would take me out, pay attention to no other girls besides me. And then the dream came crashing down when I figured out that he was super controlling, not mention someone who gets easily drunk. I didn't back out of our "relationship" because I was too afraid of something happening to me, something much worse than a beating.

Like my death.

Or Rin's death.

He threatened me that he would do the exact same thing to Rin if I left him.

How could I let that happen?

So the abuse continued.

* * *

Len's P.O.V

The punches rain onto my back, but I just lye there, making no noise, making no movements to show that I'm in pain. I know that eventually they will get bored of me not reacting, so I don't. I'm used to this- I know what to do.

And I'm right.

A couple of minutes they leave.

But that isn't enough to make the pain go away.

I'm past knowing why I get beaten up by those guys everyday. They used to present me with reasons- _"My girlfriend was looking at you,"_ or_ "You're just an eyesore"_ -but now they don't bother giving one. I'm just their human punching bag, free to use whenever needed, whenever wanted.

I don't bother telling anyone- the people that I did tell didn't listen to me, so what's the point of trying? I'll be out of this hellhole soon enough. There's no reason to fight back no.

And, I have a way to comfort myself.

I force myself to get up and go walk home. The walk is agonizing, and each step is painful, but I continue regardless. Eventually I come home, and walk upstairs as quickly as I can.

Now here comes the "fun" part.

I take out a knife.

Cut my wrist.

Watch the blood.

Try to feel better.

I wonder what Rin would think of me when she saw me right now.

* * *

Haku's P.O.V

I sigh as I see my fridge. It's nearly empty, besides the one bottle of Sake, and the old moldy cheese that's been sitting their for over a month. I take the Sake, and then sit down on my make-shift couch.

Well to Haku's-Paradise, aka an old, run down shack in the worst part of town! I assure you that it is a lot worse than it sounds!

My parent's died in middle school.

My brother in my freshmen year.

It's all my fault

so I decided to stop caring.

Drink away all my worries, even though I'm underaged.

That would have been my life plan, had I ran out of money last week. Now I'm pretty much starving. The electricity's stopped, but at least the water is still running, right?

Wrong.

I try to turn the handle on the sink, only to have a small trickle of brown water come out.

I sigh and take a swing of my Sake.

* * *

Kaito's P.O.V

I walk done the hallways, feeling relatively good. I just got an A on my last test in Chemistry- the one I was sure that I had bomb- so, why not be in a good mood? My friends wave to me, as I try to find Kiyoteru Hiyama and Lily, the people who I usually eat lunch with, even though I'm a third wheel. I'm about to round a corner when I hear voices.

"Yeah, I'm going to have her come over this week." I recognize that voice as Dell Honne. I don't know him well, but I guess he's an okay guy. Yet, for some reason, I don't round the corner, feeling the need to listen in.

"I'm surprised that she hasn't broken up with you yet," another guy says. "It's been four years already."

"She knows better not to," Dell says coldly, while cracking his knuckles. Why do I not like the sound of that? "Otherwise I'll end her life... and her friends," he finishes with a cool laugh.

My jaw drops.

"Y-You aren't serious, are you?" One of his friends ask. Dell just laughs. "It's weird though. They haven't talked to years, yet Hatsune still stays with you to protect Kagamine."

My blood runs hold.

And, before I realize what's happening, I jump out, my breathing hard.

"What... the hell WHERE YOU JUST TALKING ABOUT?!" I roar, my voice loud and angry.

"Oh, hey Shion," Dell says casually. I just grit my teeth.

"What was that about Miku?" I ask, forcing myself to calm down. Dell looks at me a bit funnily.

"You don't know? Hmm... let's just say that she's fun to play around with," Dell says with a wink.

"Really?" I ask through gritted teeth

"Sure. You can try her for one night, if you want."

With that I can't take anymore.

I lose control- can't feel myself anymore.

The next time I can see properly again, next time I get control, I find myself looking down at someone.

His skin is bright red.

He's moaning in pain.

My knuckles are covered in his blood.

* * *

Rin's P.O.V

"Rin, if you don't mind, would you please come to my classroom after school?" Luka-Sensei asks, and I nod my head, embarrassed on how everyone's head turns around to look at me as Luka speaks. I wonder what's going on.

I go into Luka's classroom afterschool, only to stop cold.

There, sitting in various corners of the room, is Len, Miku, and Haku. The only one missing is Kaito. I take a seat in the last corner- front right- and then look at Sensei, an eyebrow raised. Why is she feeling the need to recreate my childhood?

Surprisingly, Luka doesn't wait for Kaito to show up. "Now, I'm sure you all have heard about today's incident, involving your friend," Luka says.

Incident?

I raise my hand awkwardly, not really sure what's going on. "Pardon?" Luka rolls her eyes.

"You should really pay attention to what's going on around you, Rin," Luka says with a smirk. I just stick my tongue out. It's weird how comfortable I am with her, an adult, rather than the people I've known since childhood.

"Anyways, at 2:07 today, your friend, Kaito Shion-"

"He isn't my friend," I interrupt. "Not anymore."

"Rin, shut up," Luka says, an annoyed tone creeping up into her voice. I sigh, and roll my eyes. I just want to go home, go to the bathroom, to take my knife...

"Anyways, Kaito beat up your classmate, and Miku's boyfriend, Dell Honne up. To a bloody pulp where he can't really talk well anymore. His condition is stable, but he has some serious injuries, including a 2 broken ribs and a concussion. Right now he's at the hospital." I stare at Luka, not really believing it.

Kaito?

Kaito Shion?

Mr. Ice-cream-and-Miku-lover? The one who never lets anyone besides Miku wear his scarf?

That Kaito?

Impossible.

"Anyways, we were wondering if you could somehow figure out what his motive us," Luka says. "He refuses to talk, and if he doesn't talk soon, he will be expelled."

My mouth drops.

After a slight pause, Len speaks. His voice is different, yet it still holds that Len-ness that I remember so well. "Just ask his friends."

"We did, but none have a clue. We figured that it would be easier for him to open up to his childhood friends, instead of someone he has only known since high school."

"Well, you thought wrong," I say as I slide out of my seat. "We aren't friends anymore- none of us are." I'm walking past Luka's desk when she speaks again.

"Why are you so desperate to go home, Rin?" Luka asks quietly. So quietly that I know that no one else can hear. I freeze, regardless, my legs cold. "Your home isn't... isn't the best suited environmental to live in, so why do you wish to go."

My left hand begins trembling.

I grab it with my other hand, forcing it to stop, before I continue. "I have my reasons."

"Rin..."

"Luka," I say sharply. "Drop it. Please."

I exit the room, my wrist still shaking. I'm halfway down the hall when I hear someone shout "WAIT!" I turn around to see Miku running towards me.

Tears freely stream down her face. "P-Please help me, Rin," she says quietly. "I want to know why Kaito did this."

"So worried about your boyfriend?" I mock, even though my heart pangs to help her. Miku shakes her head, and I stay at her in confusion. "Then what?"

A sob escapes her throat, and suddenly she's in my arms, and I have no idea how the hell she got there. "I-It's Kaito that I-I'm worried about." Her sleeve falls back, and I see ugly bruises that run up and down her arm.

My blood runs cold.

I snatch her arm, and then pull the sleeve.

It's all different colors- puke-green, pale-blue, an angry violet.

Old scars.

New bruises.

My blood boils. "Who the hell is doing this to you?" I hiss. She looks at me, her eyes wide and panicked. I shake her a little. "Miku, you need to tell me. If we were ever friends, at any point in our lives, you _will_ tell me." So what if it's a dirty card to play?

"D-Dell," she says with a cringe, as if just saying his name will cause him to appear and beat her up.

Beat her up.

Beat him up.

Some where, in the back of my head, I have already figured out why Kaito did that to Dell. But I ignore it.

"Okay," I say. "I'll help." She throws her arms around me once again, but this time I wrap my arms around her, feeling compassion for the small girl infront of me.

* * *

"I figure that we should go talk to Kaito, first," Len says. I feel chills on my arm just by hearing his voice. He walks next to me, and I notice something on his arms.

Funny that we have the exact same arm warmers. Yellow and Black.

Miku and Haku walk behind us, Miku sniffing, Haku looking rather bored. Len leads us to Kaito's house, and we ring the doorbell. Short Kaiko Shion answers the door.

I remember Kaiko. She was short, but she was powerful, and her son and husband would listen to her every command. She was sweet, and allowed me and the others to call me by her first name.

"Oh! Wasn't expecting you guys," she says with a laugh. "Come in, right away." I nod, and we enter, exchanging our shoes for indoor slippers. "I don't know what to do with him... but, I trust that he did this for a reason. I believe that Kaito has a good enough judgement to beat someone up- which is never a good thing, of course- but, he's, I dunno, not in trouble. Well, he kinda is, but... NEVER MIND, HE'S UPSTAIRS." I nod my head, warily.

Number one rule of life: always agree with a lady in distress.

I walk upstairs, led by Len, and he throws open the door to Kaito's room. A wave of nostalgic passes over me- it's the exact same blue room as I remember it.

Kaito lies on the bed, headphones in his ears, so that he doesn't hear us. He stares at a wall. Before any of us realize what's going on, Miku is suddenly by his side, tears streaming down her face. He holds her, but in this delicate matter. Both headphone fall out of his ear, and he presses her closer, her small body folding up against hers.

"What the hell were you thinking?" She mumbles.

"Me? What about you?" Suddenly he pulls her back, staring at her. "He didn't do anything, did he? Are you alike? What happened? Why did you hide it?" He voice begins cracking. "Why wouldn't you tell any of us? Why wouldn't you tell _me_?" Her eyes widen in fear.

"Y-You know?"

"What the hell would I else would I beat Honne into a bloody pulp?" He says, pulling her closer. "Is it true? He also threatened to... uh..." Kaito's eyes flicker to me, for some reason, but Miku gets the message, and nods her head. "That _bitc_h," Kaito says. "Pansy-ass bitch. Why the hell would you not tell me?"

"Threats."

"I would have survived."

"Not others."

"Miku, that isn't a reason."

"OKAY, WILL SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN WHAT'S GOING ON TO ME?!" Len screams. I only get a portion of it, but the rest has me confused. Like, how else was Honne threatening? Len and Haku don't know anything at all, so I guess it's harder for them to understand.

Miku's eyes flicker to mine, and I nod my head.

Strange how we have been together as a group once again for only a short while, get we trust each other so much.

She pulls down one sleeve, but that's enough to send the message across. Kaito gently takes her arm, clearly not expecting the abuse to be this bad. He pulls her into a hug, and I find Len's arm around me, Haku's hand in mine. In those few moments that she shared, we grew closer once again.

"Anyways, you are not going to be expelled," Haku says finally, breaking the silence. The strong smell of Sake lingers around her, but right now she is completely sober. "That would be wrong."

"What can we do?" Len says. "Dell is son of the Head of the School Board. He will want to see some sort of punishment, of any kind."

Kaito shrugs. "I didn't tell them about Miku's... situation because I figured that she wouldn't want anyone to know. Best-case scenario- I get off with a pretty light punishment. Worst case is that I get expelled, and spend my senior year at UTAU."

"That wouldn't be right, though," I mumbled. "Even though you shouldn't have beat Honne up, you don't deserve to be punished by being expelled."

"I'll tell them," Miku says bravely. "It's time that Dell gets found out..."

* * *

And she does. Kaito still gets suspended, but Dell gets arrested for harassment. His father bails him back before Dell could even use the toilet, but the fact of the matter is that everyone knows now. His usual posse doesn't follow him, non of the girls are together. Kaito's a hero, Miku's happy, they finally begin dating.

Happy ending, right?

For them.

I walk slowly through the streets of my city, my cellphone out, my hands ready in case anyone attacks me. I don't trust walking around this late, but I was held back after school, and then had to stop by a grocer store to pick up some oranges. Before I knew it, it was dark.

My leg throbs, and I walk with a slight limp, due to a girl tripping me today. My parents won't stop fighting, and it's become too much. I just want to go home. Blow off homework. Listen to music. Feel some pain.

I sigh, shifting my phone into my other hand. It's quiet- strange for such a big city- with a car passing by occasionally.

Suddenly a hand shots out of a dark alleyway.

Grabs me.

Pulls me in.

I try to bite, but the person just laughs. I look up into the blood-red eyes of Dell Honne. He pushes me up against the wall, the look in his eyes wild and rabid. "I warned her," he hisses. "I warned Hatsune that if she didn't stick that I would get you."

Everything clicks.

Poor Miku.

Putting up all that abuse for my mistake.

Anger flows through me, and I try to fight back, but Dell's too strong and fast. "Aw, stop fighting Little Bunny. I just want to see what's underneath all of this clothing." He begins trying to strip me.

His hand reaches the arm warmer of my left arm.

I begin to shake.

"I've always wondered why you wear these," he says.

He pulls it off.

Stares at my arm.

I pull back quickly, and he's too shocked to stop me. I run out of the alleyway, sobbing for the first time in years.

I feel naked.

Raw.

Exposed.

I can't believe someone just saw my scars.

* * *

As I walk into my classroom, I can feel the stares. Dell, who had been sitting alone for the past few days, sits in the middle of a circle. "Anyways," he says loud enough so that I can hear. "Guess who I saw without her arm warmers arm?" My breath hitches as everyone looks at me while pretending to play along. "_Rin Kagamine_... no wonder she wears them. Her arm is so ugly, with all those scars on it. Makes me want to puke."

I stand up, quickly as everyone begins quieting down.

"All these nasty cuts... old, new."

I can't take anymore, and I race out of the room. As I run past, crashing into a blonde blob that ends up being Len, but ignore him asking if I'm okay. Instead I just sprint, and run outside, ignoring the teachers cries to stop. I go and hide underneath the bleachers, holding myself close. My tears continue falling.

They know.

It's only a matter of time before Len figures it out, if he didn't hear already.

I sob into my knees, not wanting to think about anything.

Maybe I should just... die.

My parents wouldn't care.

No one at school would.

There is really no point in living.

"Rin," a quiet voice says, and I jerk my head up to see Len standing above me. I gasp and look away, not wanting to look at him, to see his look of disgust, to see his scowl or lecture about how cutting yourself is bad.

"Just leave me ALONE!" I scream, my voice going a pitch higher than usual.

"Rin, look at me," Len says, his voice firm yet gentle. I just shake my head, staring furiously at the dirt underneath me. His hand wraps under my chin, and forces me to look at him.

"What?" I ask angrily. He just shakes his head, and then lifts a finger up to show to stay silent. After taking a deep breath, his hand goes for his arm warmer.

The truth hits me before he even pulls it off.

But I don't believe it.

Len Kagamine?

Cutting himself?

Yet there are the scars on his wrist that match my own.

* * *

We sit back to back, his left hand on the ground, mine on top. He holds it gently. "So, what's your story?"

I tell him.

It's amazing, the feeling of finally getting rid of this pain off my chest. I explain to Len about my parents, the way they never stop listening, never bother listening to me, or considering how I feel. I tell him how I have basically lived in complete isolation, with no friends beside Luka-Sensei. I tell him about how I've tried to stop, but never can.

Addiction.

Not to drugs.

Cuts.

He doesn't tell me he understands, but in a way, I can tell that he does. "So, what's your story." Even though we sit back-to-back, I can feel him shrugging before he launches into his story.

"It started awhile ago. My father died, I was depressed. That depression increased to such a point of doing this once I began being bullied, I guess." He suddenly moves, and I almost fall onto the ground. He catches me though.

I stare up at him.

Len stares back.

Azure meets cerulean.

"Rin... I-"

"Finish your story," I interrupt, my face red for some reason that I can't understand." He nods his head, and I pull myself out of his arms. He begins pulling his shirt off, much to my...

Embarrassment?

Pleasure?

I can't tell myself. Mix of both, I guess.

"W-What are you doing?" I stutter while looking away, my face turning a deeper shade of red.

"It'll make more sense this way," Len says, pulling the black shirt over his head.

His chest looks almost as bad as Miku's arms.

I put my hand out, fingers just barely touching his chest, not sure if I have permission to or not. He doesn't protest.

"Len... why would you let them do this to you?" I ask, my voice shaky.

"Same reason as Miku: someone else would get hurt if I wasn't there."

"You two are insane," I say with a chuckle I don't actual feel. "Why wouldn't you fight back, Len?"

"There was no point to, and, as I said, no one else would get hurt." I just shake my head, anger and depression flowing freely through me.

"This isn't right," I mumble. "I hate how basically everyone at our freaking school is a jackass. I hate how basically everyone in the entire world is a jackass."

"It's okay. It's my fault for not fighting back," Len says gently, but I shake my head. He takes my hand again, and gently cradles it. Out of the blue, he says, "Want to hear a story?"

"Are you crazy?"

"Maybe. Yes or no?"

"Um, sure," I say, totally not sure at all. Len began his story while putting his shirt back on.

Damnit.

"Once upon a time, there lived a young, deliciously beautiful boy named... let's say... NO, wait! There lived a deliciously beautiful girl named Lenka. How does that sound?"

"I think that Lenka is a bit on the narcissistic side," I mumbled.

"She was a beautiful," Len repeated. "And sweet, and friendly, and kind. She had this friend, who she also feel deeply in love with as children. Now, this friend of hers was a Princess-"

"Prince," I interpreted. "Unless _Len_ka was, you know... into yuri. Or, um... yaoi."

"NO LENKA WAS NOT! I MEANT TO SAY PRINCE, OKAY?" I rolled my eyes, but laughed nonetheless.

I wonder when was the last time that I have laughed properly.

"Does this prince get a name?"

"Yes," Len says. Suddenly he looks down at his feet, unwilling to meet my eyes. "Her- I mean, _his_ name was Rinto."

The truth hits.

My jaw drops.

"She- I MEAN HE, DAMNIT, was a very handsome boy," Len continued.

I turned warm.

Fuzzy.

I haven't been like this in who knows how long.

"And, the pair were separated for sometime. Now, Lenka never stopped thinking about Rinto, and couldn't help but to wonder if Rinto returned her feelings. So, she decided to try and get to work at the prince's castle.

"Over the years, Rinto had changed some, but was still the same Rinto that Lenka knew and loved. He had experienced wound battles-" He took my arm "-Yet he was still strong and understanding. And beau- I mean handsome. And caring. And sweet, even though he tried to hide it."

I blush.

"It was at this moment that Lenka became worried."

Worried?

"Lenka was in love with Rinto, still, but couldn't help but to wonder if she was good enough for him. He was a prince, she a commoner. 'Too good for me,' she thought," Len said sadly.

Me too good for_ Len_?

Impossible.

"Rinto wants to interrupt," I said while raising my hand.

"Lenka gives him permission," Len said, eyes trained on the floor. I reached forward.

Grabbed his shirt.

Jammed his lips against mine.

When I pull back away, Len stares at me in a slight daze.

"Stupid. I think that I'm the luckiest girl alive to have a boy like you after me. You're too good for me, not the other way around."

"Nah-uh."

"Uh-huh."

"Nuh-uh."

"Uh-huh."

"How about we are both too good for each other, so that makes us perfect!"

"Sure, despite the fact that that doesn't make sense."

We seal the deal with another kiss.

* * *

Hours later, we still lay together under the bleachers. His arm is wrapped around me, and I hold onto his chest, and we both stare at the sky through the bleachers. For a while we just talked about various things-our relationship, to name one. But soon we just kept on kissing, and then afterwards we decided to lie down and look at the clouds (through the bleachers. Not the best view, but if we sat on the field, we would get into trouble).

"Len," I say quietly after some silence.

"Mmmm-What?" I realize that I just woke him up, and feel guilt flash through me.

"We can't be together-"

"What?"

"Let me finish. We can't be together until you stand up to the boys. I'll help, okay? But, you need to do that... otherwise how can I live with myself if I know that my boyfriend is getting beat up practically every day," I explain rather breathlessly.

"Okay. But, you also need to stop wearing your arm-warmers. They aren't something you should be ashamed of. They're just old battle wounds," Len says while taking my arm and kissing it.

"No kissing," I said, and Len makes a pout-y face at me. "Too bad. But, anyways, the same applies to you, alright? Let's... let's both try and stop, okay? Doing this to ourselves can't be good..." He sighs, and makes a slightly worried face. "Don't worry, I'm sure you'll be fine," I say.

"I'm not worried about myself. I'm worried about you."

I wonder when was the last time someone said something like that.

"I'll be fine," I say, trying to give Len a reassuring smile.

"Undoubtedly. But I can't help but to worry." We lap into silence. "Promise to call me if you get the urge?"

"If you do the same."

"Deal."

And, in the months that follow, I no longer feel the urge.

* * *

Haku's P.O.V

"Yowane-san," Megurine-Sensei says after class one day. She beckons for me to come to her desk, and then waits patiently for everyone else to file out of the room.

"Yes, Sensei?" I ask as politely as I can, even though I'm really in a state of depression. I must smell disgusting- the only time I can shower is after P.E-and I haven't eaten properly in a couple of days. Just whatever I can scrap by.

"Is... is everything alright at home?" She asks. Ah, so she is one of those teachers who pretends to care, but, in truth, just doesn't give a shit.

My opinion on human beings in general isn't very high.

"Of course. Everything is fine, Sensei." She nods her head, even if she still looks unsure. At that moment, Kamui-Sensei comes into the room, his purple hair pulled back into it's usually ponytail. In his hand he holds a basket with the most delicious ever.

"Luka, we still on for lunch?" He asks while holding up the basket.

My stomach growls.

"Okay, Gakupo. Haku, listen. Get help if you need it. Please, please, please, tell me anything." I nod my head mechanically, not really feeling myself doing it. All I can do right now is wonder what food is in there. The pair exit the room, but I remain seated, trying to somehow get that smell into my mouth and fill my stomach. I sigh.

"You are the worst actress I have ever seen in my entire life," a male voice suddenly says. I whip my head around as a boy swings himself through the window and into the room.

"What the hell?" I ask, slightly annoyed that he ruined my daydreams of food. "And, were you eavesdropping?" I look at him, taking in his red hair and red eyes. Why does he seem so familiar...?

"Yes, my dear Haku!" He says cheerfully.

"How do you know my name?" His face drops.

"You don't remember me?"

"Am I supposed to?"

His face flashes a hurt look, but he quickly masks it with pretend-anger. "Aw, I'm so disappointed. Anyways, my Akaito Shion."

Akaito?

Where have I...

...That name is so familiar...

He's talking again, but I ignore him.

And then it hits.

"You're Kaito's older brother," I say, excited that I remembered.

"...And...?" He asks. I frown.

"There's more?"

"Yes, there's more," he snaps while pushing his glasses back from the bridge of his nose. I shake my head, trying to remember. His red eyes (GO RED EYES!) flash in anger for a second, but he just sighs and shakes his head.

"Well, it was a long time ago... and, you were in shock. It's no wonder you don't remember," he says while continuously shaking his head.

"What. Are. You. TALKING ABOUT?!" I roar.

"I dunno. What am I talking about?" Akaito says, and I growl.

"Whatever. I want to go have lunch," I say, and begin walking towards the door. My hand turns the door nob as Akaito answers.

"You don't have money, so how are you going to eat lunch?"

I can feel my heart stop.

The color drain out of my face.

My knees shake.

"W-What are you talking about?" I ask, trying to feebly laugh.

"You don't need to lie to me. And, I'm guess by the way you acted when Kumai-Sensei brought the basket of food, you've ran out of money." My hands shake. "Want my bento."

"I don't need it," I snap, about to leave the room. What is it so hot? Why can't I catch my breath?

"Well, then I guess it's going into the trash. I don't like leek anyways," Akaito says while mimicking the action over the trash can.

"NO," I practically scream. How could he waste food? Perfect, delicious food? "I mean..."

"Okay, so you can afford lunch," Akaito says, and I breath a sigh of relief. "But-" He walks closer to me. Too close for comfort. "-Do you still live in a shack."

My jaw drops. "That was low," I say finally, knowing that if he knows my living conditions there would be no point to fight back. He shrugs.

"You have too much pride." He tosses the bento to me. "Eat this," he says. I shrug, but take it anyways. "Oh, and I was here to tell you... Kaito is expecting you for lunch today. The old gang's joined together." I nod my head. "I'll be leaving, now," Akaito say's awkwardly, like he wants me to stop him.

"Okay."

"Like, seriously. I'm going now. No point trying to stop me," he says while turning around and walking in slow-motion.

"That's cool. Hey, thanks for the bento."

"Seriously! I'm going! I don't like hanging out in the Junior hallways anyways, cause, I'm a Senior, and stuff."

"What do you want?" I snap.

"FINALLY! So, you can get a hint." I roll my eyes. "Invite me to your lunch party," Akaito says. I walk out the room, and beckon him to follow. "It's on the roof." I nod my head, and we continue up.

"Onii-chan?" Kaito asks when we finally arrive. "Why are you here?"

"I feel so welcomed," Akaito says sarcastically. "Haku invited me."

"Did not," I say as I sit down next to Len, who has his arm wrapped around Rin. "Did you finally start dating?" I asked Len, who blushes deeply and nods his head. Miku, the Fabulous Teal Bullet, shots herself to Rin, and tackles her to the floor, pinning her wrists down.

"You WHAT?!" She screams, obviously distressed.

"I began dating Len," she says calmly. Surprisingly she's more calm about this then Len, who's all flustered. "Now get off me." Miku gets up, but holds onto Rin's wrist.

She flinches away. Miku stares at her in confusion, and Len gently pulls her away, and grabs the same wrist that Miku was holding. Rin's hand, which had been trembling, suddenly stops, and she takes a deep breath. Len whispers something in her ear, and she nods, afterwards picking up her bento and eating it. As she moves the chopsticks between the bento and her mouth, I catch site of cuts on the wrist both Miku and Len held in turn.

Rin catches my eye, and I look away guiltily, as if I'm some kid whose been staring at something I'm not supposed to be. It's weird to think that Rin would do something like self-harm to herself. As a child, she was the sweetest, most cheerful person I ever knew. Same goes for Len. But, I guess we all have problems we never told each other.

I finally begin eating, the taste of rice delicious. "Feed me," Akaito says in my ear. "I'm hungry." I hold some rice in my chopsticks, and furiously shove it up into the air. Everyone begins talking about trivial things, but it's nice talking to everyone like this. It's been a long time.

* * *

That night, as I try to get comfortable on the couch, a knock on the door walks me up. I cautiously move to the door, wondering who would want to try to talk to me at this hour. I open the door, phone in one hand, bat in the other, to see Akaito standing outside, a bento box in his hands.

"Hey, Haku!" He says rather cheerfully.

"Akaito? What the hell are you doing here?" I ask, setting down my bat.

"Well, sorry if I thought that you would be hungry! I guess I should just take this home and eat it all up myself!" He says while turning around and pretending to walk away, nose thrown into the air.

"No, please stay!" I practically beg. I awkwardly beckon him inside, and then blush despite myself.

The Shions live in a large house, with plenty of food and water.

My tiny shack doesn't even have electricity. The only light we get is the one that filters in from the street lamps outside.

"Hmm... last time I came here, you had light," Akaito says. "How about we, uh, go to the park, instead of sitting here?"

I shrug my shoulders, and then remember that he can't see me in the darkness. "Sure, I guess," I say. We slowly go back outside.

Our walk to the park is silent. I'm not sure what to say, but the main thing I'm feeling is gratitude. "Hey, thanks for everything, Akaito," I say, my words slow and foreign on my tongue.

"Wouldn't want such a pretty girl starve to death," Akaito says. I snort slightly, and he looks at me in concern. "What? It's true that you could starve to death."

"No, it wasn't that," I say. I don't really believe that I'm pretty, but I'm not fishing for Akaito to tell me about how I am.

"Fine. You're not pretty. Your beautiful," Akaito says, reading my mind.

I blush.

"Like, seriously. Red eyes are the best!" Akaito cheers while pointing to his own. I roll my eyes, but I have a soft smile on my face. We sit down on a park bench as an old, elderly couple passes us. He opens the bento box, to reveal ramen inside of it. "Sorry, it's only from the stall on the side of the road."

"Old Man Yuuma's?"

"Yeah, his and Mizki's. Although, he doesn't like it when you call him that."

"I know." I scoop the ramen into my mouth, savoring the taste. Two actual meals in a row. I feel blessed.

"Hey, can you cook?" Akaito asks out of the blue. "And, like, do house chores."

"Well, I guess I can," I say awkwardly. "But I would need things to cook with and a house to work in. But, you know... I'm too poor..." I look away, feeling ashamed.

I always regret not bothering to find a job while I could. Instead I took all of my inheritance money and blew it all off onto Sake, turning myself into a drunk. Could have stopped at any time, but I didn't bother. I've been looking for a job, lately, but I can't seem to find any job that will let me go part-time.

"Okay, that's good. Hey, do you remember yet?" Akaito asks. "Surely you remember me."

"Random, aren't we?" I ask. But, I pause to think.

And then it hits me.

"YOU WERE AKAI-CHAN!" I scream, jumping up and spilling hot ramen all over myself. I look at ramen in dismay for two seconds, but then go back to look at Akaito.

"Um, did you just burn yourself?"

"You... OH MY GOSH, YOU LOOK SO DIFFERENT! Wait, aren't you a girl?"

"NO! I NEVER WAS! YOU JUST ALWAYS ASSUMED AND NEVER BOTHERED TO ASK." I blush deep red.

Along time ago, right after my parent's accident, when I still lived in an actual house, my brother once brought home a little kid and asked me to stay with "her." Before, Akaito looked like a total girl- His hair was long, longer than Len's, and he had these big, doe-like eyes. He even wore pretty girly clothes. Anyways, we hung out for a long time, and he made me feel better after my parents death, which I was still recovering from. Then he went to high school, and I remained in middle school as an 8th grader. After that we just kind of lost touch.

"No wonder I didn't recognize you; I always though you were a girl, Akaito," I said. Then, all of a sudden, I realize that my leg is absolutely burning, and I look down to see that it looks like I wet myself.

Shit. I can't shower until tomorrow, during 5th period.

"Uh, I needa go home and change," I said.

"Oh, I was getting to that," Akaito says, and I look at him in confusion. He suddenly gets up and begins walking, bento box in one hand. After a few steps, he turns around to look back at me. "You coming or what?" He asks. I run to catch up, not sure what is going on. He extends his hand out, and I take it.

"Where are we going?"

"Somewhere."

We walk for sometime more. "Okay, now close your eyes," Akaito instructs. I do so, and he slips his hand out of mine. He then covers my eyes. "Just in case," he mumbles, his head dangerously close to mine.

"Okay," I say in a whisper. He leads me into what seems like a building, and then up a flight of stairs. Releasing his hands from my face, Akaito instructs, "Don't open them yet." It then sounds like he's trying to open a door, to his eventual success. Akaito's hand then pulls me. "Okay, you can open them."

I'm looking at an apartment.

A clean, furnished apartment.

"What?" I ask. It's a nice place. Some place I can never afford.

"My new place," Akaito says. "Kitchen, living room, two bathrooms and bedrooms," he continues while opening doors to show me. "Three closets, balcony. Good view."

"Why are you telling me this?" Akaito doesn't reply.

Instead he reaches into his pocket, and pulls out a red string, a silver key attached to it. "I mean to say _our_ new place."

My jaw drops.

"I'm moving out of my parents house, and all, since I have to be in college. I choose to be in an apartment instead of a dorm." He turns and smiles at me. "You do cooking, cleaning, and get a job to pay for half the grocery money. I'll pay rent."

I'm still in a state of shock.

"We can be roommates. Until... it turns into something more," He finishes, a devious smile on his face. And, I can' help but to feel excited.

* * *

Rin's P.O.V

My parents are fighting once again downstairs. I stand in the bathroom, my breathing hard. I look at the down at the sink, where two objects sit.

A phone.

And a knife.

The urge is strong- the strongest it's been in a long time. Perhaps it's this particular fight, perhaps it's because I was especially picked on today in school.

Now everyone looks at me weirdly, like, _"Oh, there's the weird freak that cuts herself! We should laugh at her until she feels no strand of digneity left!_"

Wish they'd understand.

I'm human.

I have feelings.

I don't want to be like this.

I wish I could blame it on them.

But I can't.

It's their fault for laughing at me.

It's my fault for being so extreme.

I look back down at the two objects, and think about what more. Poor Len, I think to myself. Having to deal with such a troublesome girlfriend.

He finally fought back one day. I was in class one day, while he was out in P.E. As I stared out of the window, I noticed an arrangement of boys, crowded around a much smaller one. With a rush of anger, I realized that it was Len, and I quickly stood up.

"Rin Kagamine, what do you think you're doing?" The teacher asked. Ever since me cutting myself had been found out, none of the teachers trust me to go to the bathroom, unless it's Luka.

"Nothing, Megpoid-Sensei. Sorry." I bowed and then sat down, staring anxiously out the window. I wanted to scream with anger that I couldn't do anything. I saw a boy wind up for a punch, and then stood up again.

"Rin!"

"Sorry, Megpoid-Sensei! I need to go and do something." I rushed out of the classroom before she could catch and stop me.

Racing down the steps.

Faster, faster, Rin.

I ignored the teachers calls to bring me back, and then burst through the backdoors. After looking left and right, I began sprinting to the side of the building, where I had seen the boys. I stopped in shock when I saw them.

Two boys were on the floor, looking rather dazed.

Three Boys running away.

One boy with a nasty nosebleed.

_My_ boy standing in the middle of them, breathing rather heavily.

"Oh, hey Rin," Len said when he saw me. I just began sprinting again, and threw myself onto him. He caught me easily, and then spun me around.

"You took seven boys at once?" I mumbled in his ear.

"Yeah," he answered, his voice oddly deeper than usual. "I was already planning on standing up for myself, but I wasn't going to fight back. Well, not until they made some remark able how they thought my girlfriend was creepy. I kind of lost control of myself. So, that's how the Hulk feels..." I smiled.

"Bad boy," I pretended to scowl.

"Hey, can I kiss you know?" Len asked while pulling his head back from his ear. "I've been waiting all week." I shyly nodded my head as Len began leaning in.

It was pretty hot.

Not to mention intense.

"You see," a voice suddenly said. "That is how you kiss a girl, Kaito."

"What? I'd be afraid of hurting you, Miku."

"Oh, grow up, you two."

"Of course Ha-ku would be all experienced with his older boyfriend."

"He's NOT my boyfriend!"

"Awwwwwww, really?"

"Akaito? What are you doing here?"

I finally broke away, much to Len's anger, and looked to see the group standing about two feet away. "What the hell?"

"Ignore us," Miku said. "We aren't interrupting anything."

"Okay, good," Len said, and then he tried to kiss me again. I held a hand up, but allowed myself to stay in his arms.

Looked down to see his hand on mine.

Our matching scars, our battle wounds.

Smiling when I saw no new fresh ones.

* * *

**I feel bad for this is the second time I've put Miku in an abusive relationship :/ I'm such an evil person .**

**So, how was it? I'm considering making this into a long fanfiction, but I just dunno...**

**Anyways, please review! Makes me feel warm inside ^_^ (wow, that sounded creepy)**


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